Am I a good actress yet?!

I don't know what I want to happen... It'd be lovely if one day I awoke and everything were right again.
But the truth is that I can never forget all this hurt... it may take some time to realize that I'll never trust this relationship again.

There isn't a part of me that does not feel betrayed by somebody! And at this point it doesn't matter who hurt which part, but I've become very bitter and very cautious.

People care.

But I'm not sure how much I can let them in anymore.

If you can't befriend me fully then leave me be!

I'm sore with all the hurts!

And I'm tired of putting up a front, pretending that it's all alright because I'm too nice to do otherwise.

I'm not sure if this pain I feel is entirely my own, but even if it isn't it has become so.

Isolation.......

sounds wonderful.

I have no fear of drowning it's breathing that's taking all this work

I saw Tony today. I pretended I didn see/ know him. It would have been so much better if I had just acknowledged him. I wish I had.

I ask myself all the time how it is possible for a group to feel like friends or for two people to be different and ever really connect.

Why do I live at all? I not good at it.

Does it matter if anyone understands me or not? I don even understand. And I may have never really understood anyone else.

How sad am I? Have I reached a new low? I feel like I back in high school! I would welcome medication at this point. Any easy escape will do.

But this sadness just won go away and my school work, family, and friends are waiting for something that I can give. I suppose that I waiting for everything to get worse. Perhaps, for someone to notice. Not sure if that ever helped before or if it would really make me feel better, or if me feeling better would really make anything at all better. But if this is how happiness will always end then maybe I better off staying here. I not sure what I want. My mind keeps changing every other moment. I want to be saved?no, I don. I DON KNOW!

God, is this how you made me or the way Ie become?! Because I really like it if you could just fix me or at least state something plainly so the answer would be undeniable.

Any easy way out?? Any way at all, please.

Because I had to keep it somehow...

Currently Listening The Ugly Organ By Cursive see related

April Fools' Day

Yeah, It's lame I know , but here it is...